The day before Thanksgiving marked 11 years since my dad died. This year felt a little harder because the dates lined up exactly the same way as they did back then. After all these years, I don’t expect to hear from friends, but it’s such a sweet surprise when I do. Two friends sent texts letting me know they remembered my dad, and it meant the world to me.
Now, when a close friend loses someone they loved, I set an annual reminder on my phone, either on the person’s birthday or on the anniversary of their death, so I can remember to reach out. I know how much that simple message can help.
~Adina
The holidays can magnify grief at unexpected times and once beloved traditions can feel complicated. If someone you love is grieving this season, small, thoughtful acts can offer real comfort. Here are specific ways to show you care that we've learned over the years from our Take Them A Meal friends:
1. Send a pressure-free check-in.
A simple message like "Thinking of you today - no need to respond" honors their grief without asking anything of them. Several readers have shared how these short, steady texts helped them feel remembered.
2. Drop off a ready-to-eat dinner.
A warm casserole, soup, or rotisserie chicken on the porch is one of the most universally appreciated gifts. Meals requiring no prep and no conversation are often the biggest relief.
3. Prepare a breakfast basket.
We once featured a family who said breakfast was the hardest part of their day. A bag with muffins, yogurt, and fruit can make mornings easier when energy is low.
4. Stock their freezer "for a hard day."
Many caregivers have told us that freezer meals are extra helpful during the holidays when emotions ebb and flow. Label a few items with notes like "Heat on a tough evening."
5. Leave a small seasonal comfort.
A candle, a cozy blanket, or no-bake energy bites can quietly say, "You're not alone." These simple gestures are thoughtful ,but not overwhelming. Many users like our You Are Loved spoons for this purpose.
6. Honor their loved one's memory.
Drop off Christmas cookies and a small ornament "in honor of" the person they lost. A handwritten memory in a card can bring warmth.
7. Offer help with one holiday task.
Instead of asking "What do you need?", try something specific:
"I'm heading out. Can I pick up your groceries?"
"Can I wrap a few gifts for you?"
Focused offers are easier to accept.
8. Sit with them - no agenda.
Some of our most moving TTAM stories involve someone simply sitting nearby, sharing tea, or being present for twenty quiet minutes. Grief feels lighter when someone is willing to enter the silence with you.
9. Provide a "gentle evening" option.
Give a small bag with hot cocoa mix, tea, soup, or a little note. This "evening kindness" is perfect for nights when it gets dark early and heaviness can set in.
10. Give permission to skip traditions.
A reassuring note like "You don't have to do everything this year - let the holidays be whatever you need them to be" can be incredibly freeing. So many families have told us they needed this reminder more than anything else.
At Take Them A Meal, we've seen again and again that you don't need grand gestures to support a grieving friend. Small actions, offered consistently and without pressure, bring real care during the holidays and always.
From all of us at Take Them A Meal, we know that the holidays can feel heavy for those who are grieving. We hope these ideas inspire you to reach out with kindness this season, and that you feel encouraged to make a difference in someone's holiday in a meaningful way.
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In Case You Missed It
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Don’t have Instagram? Click here for the recipes!
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Don’t have Instagram? Click here for the recipe!
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Don’t have Instagram? Click here for the instruction link!
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